Dating For Always

Last Friday night, a friend invited me out to go flamenco dancing at Boom. I love the food there and I know they have really great live music occasionally (I was serenaded right out front on Spring Street by an older gentleman who sang there on Thursday nights. He wanted to court me. Serenading is a good way to start!) 

Ok, back to last Friday night. I was invited out by my friend, the woman who recently started this blog to celebrate the birthday of her friend, the photographer who shot the In The Flesh Erotic Reading Series that I was a part of in August (Kevin Bacon, I’m almost there). We ended up having dinner because the band got stranded upstate. There was only one band member who made it and he was, um, entertaining my friend when I arrived. Like I really felt like I was interrupting something. Sorry, buddy, didn’t mean to cock-block!

After my wine and Agnolotti Burro e Salvia, the conversations started to “take off”. You know the deal. After the whole, what do you do/where do you work, how do you know the birthday boy, we got down to the good stuff. I admit, I missed part of it because I was scouring the bar for a sexy European but another woman at the table asked my opinion on dating – how I felt about it, did I enjoy it et al.

Break On Through To The Other Side

I started nude modeling in 2006. Great experiences, some a bit wacky, luckily none scary or dangerous. Now I’m on the other side of the lens. I shot my first art nude model last Wednesday night. I got the (paid) gig through Craigslist. That’s actually where I got my first modeling gig as well. That photo shoot was paid too and resulted in one of my favorite shots wearing a fishnet dress.

The Nihilistic Sex Machines

When you have to Google the meaning of a word in a musical duo's name, you know you’re onto something golden.

Last Tuesday night, I went to Don Hills to shoot The Nihilistic Sex Machines (TNSM). I almost didn’t make it cause of more of those life and financial issues that are commonplace right now, but Johnny B. Azari had my back.

I'll Pencil You In

"Maybe we can get together for a drink this week, Wednesday or Thursday..." he said, part question, part statement.

"Yeah, I'm free."

"Ok, we will keep in touch," he said motioning with his phone. He hadn't yet put it back in his pocket after we exchanged numbers.

Yeah, I'm free

On my walk to Prospect Park last Friday and got a call and easily scheduled a meeting for this upcoming Friday.

"What day works for you?"

I answer that question any number of ways: "Any day works for me", "I'm free all week", "I can work around your schedule" or the ol' answer-a-question-with-a-question, "Well what day works for you?"

Kinda Hot On A Cold Winter's Day

Turns out my Saturday was pretty eventful. I wasn't going to sit at home. And quite frankly, the cold temperatures lured me outside. I like the cold. I own a great coat. Ergo, cold isn't so.

Starting point: 14th & 5th
Destination: Canal & Ludlow

On the third and final leg of my walk, I heard sirens and saw a fire truck speed across Grand St while I walked south on Ludlow. When I made it to the corner of Broome, I stumbled upon a scene: 2 fire engines, a group of people being evacuated from a restaurant and neighboring business. The fire engine that sped West on Grand, finally pulled up on Orchard.

Namaste Healing

White Sage, Juniper Berries & Leaves and my Aventurine and Amethyst

Today I visited the Namaste Bookshop. I almost walked right by it because I was expecting it to be in the same spot that East West Books was on 5th Avenue. The last time I was in that shop was on a birthday in my early 20s. I was hanging out with a friend that evening and he took me there. He bought some oil and a pair of "yes-no" earrings as a birthday gift.

I was buying a birthday present for a friend who is a Buddhist and who I love to death. I knew I wanted to get him a book (he's a huge reader) and possibly some other trinkets. I also wanted to give something to him. I meditated with him this past summer. Actual meditation, not just sitting and thinking. He taught me the proper technique and it's been great.

Random Musings On Snow, Fathers, Birds And Possible Rape

So I didn't make it to Prospect Park during the December 26th snow storm we had in New York. Stayed within a 7 block radius of my house. But still got a great hike in, amazing photos and met amazing people. There's something about this kind of weather that brings folks together.

So, it snowed again during the early morning hours of Friday. I love snow. And, no, I don't need an intervention. It's winter. It should snow. Being miserable about it only makes your days harder.

I went to Prospect Park this afternoon. Camera phone and Canon handy. I love how peaceful the park is, even when there are people there. That's one observation I made. Walking through the park forces me to think.

SBF Seeks Alpha Male

I haven't worn a bra in weeks. I lost mine. I own others but I just don't feel like wearing those. I have a love-hate relationship with bras. So when I find one that I actually like, I hold on because she holds me. I lost my bra because a man told me to take it off. Why did I take it off because he told me? Because he told me to.

I was slightly intoxicated and accepted a ride from a friend. Seconds after entering his vehicle he turned to me and told me he'd been thinking about hooking up for a while. I was surprised but I continued to listen.

"So this is what's gonna happen. I'm gonna drive you someplace first and then I'll take you home." He turned to face the road and pulled out of the parking space. If I didn't know him, I could've called the police for fear of being abducted.

Chris Hansen Caught Another One

FADE IN:

STONE PHILLIPS

A warning, some of what you are about

to see and hear is explicit.

INT. KITCHEN – CONDO – NIGHT

ABIGAIL enters. She looks around the modern kitchen, impressed with the digs. She walks by the stove, running her fingers along the steel surface. She stops in front of the fridge. She studies the LCD screen on the door.

CHRIS HANSEN enters wearing a black sports jacket over a brown turtleneck carrying a small stack of papers.

CHRIS HANSEN

That’s a pretty impressive fridge,

isn’t it?

Abigail turns to him and nods.

ABIGAIL

Yeah, is that a control panel or

an actual TV?

Chris posts up next to the center island. Abigail eyes him with intense sexual interest. He places the papers down on the countertop.

CHRIS HANSEN

(motions to a

 bar stool)

Why don’t you go ahead and have

a seat?

Pedophilia Mammalia

No Photo

Will Be

Available

You know how much I love Law & Order: SVU. Like a lot. Like, I'm gonna write an episode one day. The last episode to air entitled, "Possessed", didn't disappoint. I think that show is a great study of human behavior and psychology with a cast that is very easy on the eyes.


But anyway, I sat watching that episode wrapped in my Snuggie with my brow furrowed in anger and disgust at the overweight pedophile salivating over little girls and the old defendant smugly walking out of court again. His defense: his books were fiction and therefore he could not be charged with conspiracy even though a pedophile used his books as "instruction manuals". Interesting. Write about anything you want, as long as it's fiction and you're protected under the First Amendment?

Wanted Men Wanted

So I had a vague idea come to me about 2 weeks ago. A word collage of quotes. I wondered, no, I wanted to know what made men feel wanted. Often times there are talk shows and articles and blogs about women and their wants, needs, desires. But what about men? Surely, they wanted to feel wanted. And since I was questioning it, did men feel wanted by their families, friends, lovers, coworkers, society?

Thank You, 2010.

Two thousand and ten was a good year. I've entered a new phase in my life. The change was and still is palpable.

I've outgrown things and people this year. Any thought patterns or habits that were holding me back I pushed through, using the fear and angst as motivation. Any habits that were positive and I had let go in recent years, I've reclaimed.

Toxic, stale or one-sided relationships faded way or I ended them. I welcome these endings because the energy they've freed leaves me free to welcome positive beginnings.

I've continued to create and grow this year.

Visions of passport visa stamps dance in my head.

I don't have a cork board yet but I always make notes of things I want and need to accomplish and map out a way to get there. Tuesday night I was writing a to-do list. One of the list entries was in the form of a question which I started answering as I went along. As quickly as I put my question and answer down on paper, I stumbled upon a gallery in SoHo that will play prominently in my future. I asked a question and received an answer


I would do myself a huge disservice if I didn't follow through on the growth that as taken place this year; continue to live a healthy and non-restrictive lifestyle, continue to show gratitude and appreciation for those that have been instrumental and supportive, share my knowledge with others, and continue to be an artist motivated by the love of creativity, emotion, human stories and honest provocativeness.

Last year, I noticed the changing of the guard with the legends and pioneers we've lost. We've lost more this year. We continue to be on the verge of greatness. Still on my list of things to accomplish - BECOME AN ICON.

Two thousand and eleven, I can't wait to meet you.

Telling Time On My Biological Clock

Last Friday, I got a phone call. I didn't recognize the number but I answered because it could've been a potential employer calling.

"Hello," I said.

"Mom?" a little boy asked on the other end.

This was the first time I had ever been called that, even if it was a mistake. People tend to assume I have children and are surprised when I tell them that I don't. But it's weird, I paused, thinking, "Am I?" I think I said "hello" again or "what?" or "excuse me". He asked again, "Mom?"

Bursting To Burlesque

I finally bought a pair of pasties this week. They're called "French Titties". Those of you who know about my latest "everything French phase" really understand why I had to buy them. I purchased them at SHAG--they had a holiday party for family and friends. I flipped through all the packets of pasties like a playing cards, holding some of them up to my chest (would they provide adequate coverage?) or against my skin (would the colors complement or clash with my skin tone?). Then I found a B&W pair. Money!


I'd love to do burlesque. Maybe not for a career but I'd like to do a performance. I really enjoy watching burlesque. I think it's very sexy. A good show provides laughs and titillation. I'm most familiar with Brown Girls Burlesque and now they have a Broad Squad Institute. When I'm ready, I'll contact them and I'll be sure to invite all you to my graduation.

Am I A Black Feminist?

During the week of Thanksgiving, The Lion's Historian asked for my thoughts on Black feminism in 200 - 500 words. I wasn't sure I'd get any words because I'd never thought of myself as a Black feminist. So I thought, I scribbled notes, I mused in the shower, I did some freewriting in bed, I even caught Sex in '69: History of the Sexual Revolution in America that same week.

World Cup Of Love -- Addendum

I was editing the first part of a new short story I'm working on. iTunes shuffling in the background as usual...

Then "Going On" by Gnarls Barkley came through my speakers and just put me in an even better mood. It made me think of the World Cup and made me think of him (the timing is uncanny because one of the characters in the story I'm working on is based on him).

So that's why he came to mind this morning when I heard the song, but honestly, that was quickly overshadowed by the World Cup itself, the game of football, the passion. The Puma commercial they aired on television was different from this one, but I would jump up and down in celebration right along with the players on the screen.

I truly, truly enjoyed the energy of the World Cup this year (despite ALL of my teams not doing well) there was still so much to enjoy and so many people to root for. I hear this song... I watch this video and it gives me chills.


Youtube user hansbukow summed it up perfectly:

Thank you Africa for reminding us of what it's all about!!!

The fun, love and passion of simply kicking a ball with your best friends.

I feel really blessed to have the beautiful game embedded in my soul and this video helps me connect with that wonderful feeling.

Love. Change. Yourself.

You ever step outside of yourself and can see yourself growing and changing? It's a powerful thing; watching your transformation is transformative in itself.

I fell in love with myself today. I was going through the previews from a photo shoot with photographer and friend, Tom Spianti. I saw my mother in some of those photos. Like I really see what people saw when they said I look like her. I also look like a mother. I look at some of those photos and see how my children are going to see me.

There are changes that are in my immediate future that I don't have too much control over. The decisions I make, how hard I fight change (which I'm known to do sometimes) will determine my happiness. I took that trip down memory lane, chronicling all the places in New York City that have shaped me. It was enjoyable but not sad at all. I didn't yearn for the past anymore.

How strong am I? How scared am I?

Paris. Every where I turn there are signs pointing to Paris. Abigail Ekue : The Native Creative New Yorker... In Paris. I may have to change my website logo.

This Blog Is About You

A few days ago, I mused randomly on Twitter: Each time I write a story about someone, they're gone from my life (bed) soon after. It's like a sexual obituary.


I don't blog about my current paramours, flings, partners (pick a word). It just so happens at a reading I participated in last night, another author mentioned she wrote a book about her lover and then they broke up. She told us she definitely learned her lesson. I do blog about my friends if there's something fun or funny, amazing, karmic, sweet or ingenious that happened. But I won't get too personal or give too many identifiable details about them.


We live in a tell-all society where everyone wants to know-all about everyone else but themselves.

30 Years In New York City

I got the idea while I was journaling the night before my birthday to go visit all the old neighborhoods I used to live in. Go back to my old addresses and schools and take photos; chronicle what gentrification has done to Hamilton Heights and SoBro (Harlem and the South Bronx, as I know them)


About halfway into the trip, I had already seen a roller-blading professor whose sneakers I retrieved when he dropped them as he clunked his way past me. I saw construction taking place on 143rd and 144th between Amsterdam and Convent which I swear has been going on since the 90's. Took the Bx19 to my old neighborhood going past Lincoln Hospital (where it all began) and had flashbacks to the rides on that bus to and from school. It was amazing, despite all the time that had passed, not much had changed at all.

I Can Take No For An Answer

It hit me the other day that I don't pitch articles nearly as much as I used. Actually, I think it's been almost a year. This is not because I don't want any more of my articles published, it's due to the lack of response. As a writer, I get rejections all the time. That's not an issue. It's the silence that makes the whole process seem pointless and somewhat discouraging. I live by, "You won't know until you ask" and "Ask and ye shall receive" as played out in my life on numerous occasions.


Just say 'no.' Seriously, I can take it.