Ask Abbie: In Love With Another Woman

In Love With Another Woman Asks:

I am turning 52 this month. I've been happily married for nearly 25 years, we have three kids, the youngest of whom is 14, the oldest in college. I work at home, and several years ago, with my wife's full knowledge and consent, I hired a friend of ours, a mom I'll call Karen, to help me with my business. We got along fine, it was good for my business, a strictly working relationship, and she left after about 2 years to take a full time job.

She was a friend to both of ours, and she still came over often after her job ended, our kids were pals, etc. We walked dogs together. On one of these walks, she gave me a letter, asking me to read it later. When I did, it told me that she loved me, but she knew I was married, and that she couldn't keep relating to me the same way. We could no longer be friends.

The problem is, I'd fallen in love with her as well. I rushed to her and told her so. We spent a month talking tearfully back and forth before my wife found out. She was outraged, naturally, and I stopped all communication with Karen.