Slut Shaming, Miscommunication And Amazing Sex

Back in the Saddle

I saw George again. A week had passed since we'd last been together when I received a text from him during rush hour which read, "You must be in need of a massage later".


I will never decline his invites (as long as I'm free) due to his track record of sexing me down and his actual massages. We settled on the when and the what I should bring with me:  massage oil -- and condoms.

I'm working with a good stash so that wasn't an issue. The issue came moments later.

Lay Your Hands On Me

Back in the Saddle

Source

Yes, this encounter includes a massage, just like my story of the same name, but this one ends differently. It begins differently too.


On a Sunday night, I, minding my business, checked my phone and saw 3 new text messages from George*.They'd been sent almost 2 hours prior. I was in another room yucking it up with friends and hadn't heard my phone ring.


I turned down George's invite to go over to his place. It was late and I had settled in to do some writing for the night. He revealed he was alone and figured he'd ask anyway. No harm, no foul. I teased him that he was gonna guilt me into saying yes but I really had to do my writing. If things were different on my end I would've just invited him over.


Text from George: No problem. just come here :)


I told him I wouldn't get much writing done at his place. For one of the few times in my life I didn't mean that with any adult or sexual undertone. I figured it would be like the first night George and I met and I went over to his place -- we'd sit and talk, he'd play his instruments, we'd sip on orange juice, he'd light up, we'd discuss art and the artist's life...


That's not what he had in mind this time.

Ask Abbie: Just A Little Cunnilingus Between Friends

Hungry For Kitty Asks:

Without getting into too much detail, I want to ask a good acquaintance if I can give her oral sex. We are both massage therapists that met in class and have traded sessions on and off for the last 3 years. I am not interested in receiving anything in return, just want to take my time and satisfy her. I want this to be a one time thing with NO emotional effects. It is always hard to tell if there is a mutual attraction but I will say that we are both good looking people.


The kicker, I have been in a relationship for 3+ years with a girl who has been going through a lot the last year and a half. We do not have a sex life. She will go down on me every so often but that is basically it. I haven't seen her totally naked in more than a year. I do enjoy performing oral sex and miss it a lot. My g/f is from out of state so does go home to visit family and she gave me a hall pass before. I did not do anything during that time and we have never discussed it further.


Now the girl I want to give oral to is the only person I told about the "sex life" I have been experiencing. No one else. So she has sympathized with me on it. So I feel she will have an understanding of where I am coming from. But again, I don't want an emotional strings and want to make that clear to her as well. I just want it to be strictly physical and not ruin what we have. It is basically her helping me and getting oral in return.

How should I go about this? Any advice will be appreciated.

Clench

I had a pretty great workout last night. Great post-workout shower. Then meditated for 10 measly minutes. I haven't been able to get back to 20+ minute meditation sessions for about a month.

There's a knot on the left side of my back - rhomboids and lower trap. It hurts. I know part of it is due to structural issues but it's also due to stress.

During my recent meditation(s), I repeatedly have to drop my bottom jaw, releasing the tension. Sometimes I realize how tight I'm gripping my stones. No bueno. I'm not sure if I'm a tooth-grinder at night, but sometimes as I'm drifting off to sleep, I notice my fists are clenched. Even in sleep, there are moments when I'm not relaxed.

The next time you're waiting for the train or in line at Starbucks take a moment to become aware of the level of tension in your body. Are you fists clenched? Shoulders touching your ears? Jaw tight? Ass checks clenching a piece of thread? Toes forming a fist in your shoes? When your cell phone rings or vibrates make note of your physical reaction. Ringtones are an attempt to sugarcoat the intrusion to our lives.